Last week, something life changing happened to me. Although to be fair, I'm using the term 'life changing' as loosely as Justin Bieber's pants. I was actually approached for a role in a short video, but was later rejected because and I quote 'I don't look mature enough.' Now, the life changing thing which happened to me is not rejection. No, that happens to me almost every time I approach a girl so I wouldn't say it changed my life in any way. What really shook me to the core was that this is the first time in my life that someone did not take me seriously because I don't look matured enough.

My youthful features have often been the ice breaker for any social gatherings. People would stare at me curiously for a few seconds, brows wrinkled and ask 'How old are you anyways?'. While this loaded question usually leads to new friendships, no one actually believes me when I state my actual age (I'm born in 1990), and some even request to see my IC just to prove it. Not surprisingly, this has happened a few times at cinemas ('Where are your parents? This is an 18 movie.') and when going for events at clubs ('Masuk, masuk, masuk...stop. IC please.')

I've lived with this for most of my young adult life (ie: right now) and it hasn't caused me much problems yet. Until last week's incident. It made me sit up and think for a second. I always thought that my youngish looking face will be envied by everyone, but apparently, the effect is the direct opposite. Everyone thinks I'm a budak who cannot be relied on. How can I expect to find a girlfriend when people my age look so much older than me? How can bosses safely pass on major projects if they think a child cannot handle the pressure? How will I get a boss in the first place if no one is willing to hire a kid? It would be the end of my life!

Therefore, in an attempt to be taken more seriously by everyone I meet in the future, I've decided to take a few measures to make myself more matured. This is not for shit and giggles (sorry) but it's for the betterment of my future.

Step 1: Appearance

One of the things I'm most confident about myself is my outward appearance. However, this is also one of the reasons why I'm not being taken seriously by anyone. I haven't changed my K-POP inspired hairstyle since I left high school, and I often wear T-shirts with cutesy cartoon characters emblazoned on the front. Also, despite being 23 this year, I have the face of an 18 year old.

Pictured: Not an adult.

Therefore, I've decided that for the sake of my future, I have to discard all my current cutesy T-shirts for something more adult, like that brand with the man brandishing a stick above his head while riding a horse, Polo or Yolo or whatever they call it.

I wouldn't want to go under the knife to make my face more matured, so I guess there's no helping that. It's either plastic surgery, or I live my life with my face hidden under a plastic bag with holes.

As shown.

Step 2: Communication

Communication is also one of the more damning points which puts my maturity under the telescope. My topics of discussion usually range from the latest chapter of various mangas, to a detailed analysis of video games, and whatever videos made me laugh on Youtube. I also talk a lot about Running Man, but that's something everyone enjoys so shut up.

For me to be seen as a more matured person, I obviously have to start a matured discussion with others as well. I looked up 'mature topics'  on Googles and came up with a list of racially abusive topics which will sooner land me in jail than among the matured people. I did another search and they suggested that I speak about the news, my personal life experiences, and any life lessons I may have learned. With that in mind, here is my new icebreaker:

"Did you hear about *insert whatever trending news topic*? I had a similar experience once too. My advice to you: you really shouldn't get into that situation at all. Oh hi, my name is Joel". Boom! Maturity.

Step 3: Picking Friends

My best friends and I are in a group called the Buggers. I think I need to find new friends.

They also look like this. 

Step 4: Other Self Improvements

One of the things listed as immature is attention seeking. As far as I know, I'm one of the most tak tau malu kind of people around. Ask the people who hang out with me sometimes. They would wrinkle their nose in disgust at the very mention of my name; 'Joel ah? Which part of his face did he show got no pimples this time?" I probably have to stop showing off my flawless skin.

I should also improve my sense of humor. I find the most juvenile stuff incredibly funny, and will laugh at the video of a farting panda for 10 minutes straight (or until I pass out). C'mon, farting pandas are freaking hilarious.

Hilarious!

I've also been told I'm annoying. Am I? Am I? Am I? Am I? Am I? Am I? Am I? Am I? Am I? Am I? Am I? Am I? Am I? Am I? Am I? Am I? Am I? Am I? Am I? Am I? Am I? Am I? Am I? Am I? Am I? Am I? Am I? Am I? Am I? Am I? Am I? Am I? Am I? Am I? Am I? Am I? Am I? Am I? Am I? Am I? Am I? Am I? Am I? Am I? Am I? Am I? Am I? Am I? Am I? Am I? Am I? Am I? Am I? Am I?

Am I?

Oh. Okay...I see what they mean.

Step 5: Give Up

That's supposed to be a white flag. You know a picture fails when I have to explain it. 

After going through steps 1-4, I realize that whatever efforts I put into trying to mature myself will only be wasted. I'm me, I'm awesome, and I don't want to grow up. So what if people don't take me seriously? Heck, I don't even take myself seriously. Sure I may be growing older, but inside, I'm pretty much still a bubbly man-child who enjoys childish things. I may seem immature to some people, but that doesn't mean that I'm unreliable.

I don't want to grow up. Not yet at least. Here's to being a kid.

Cheerios!